I'm extremely late I know. I feel obligated to go see new media that is culturally important for the African American community. This was one of those things. For some reason or another I'm just now getting to it. Here are my thoughts.
I adore seeing POC love. Whether it is the same ethnicities or different POC ethnicities I love seeing it. There is something genuinely important about the following groups: Latinx Love and families. Now so many are being torn apart by immigration; indigenous love, family, and community. As their children have constantly been taken away from them. Rights to their land have historically and presently continue to be violated. Their population numbers are dwindling due to numerous factors; Middle eastern love, as they are constantly labled terrorist and the subjects of hate; Muslim love (I know this is a religion and not an ethnicity) that is forfilling to anyone engaging in it. Whether its a women who wants to be submissive to her husband or love that respects the women, her autonomy, and let's her live her life according to how she define her gender roles/expectations. People who want to engage in poly marriages. Queer Muslims love.; Black love and families. A nation that has systemically torn Black family aparts from its beginings. Amercia says/trys to make black men dead beat dads, jobless, criminals, uneducated, unskilled, unable to have emotionally healthy relationships, and violent. America says/trys to make Black women are angry, spiteful, want too much, uneducated, sex objects, and only able to have babies but can't raise them.
I love black celebrity couples. When I see them I hope they stay in love with eachother forever. That once they get married, I hope they stay married, and love being married to their spouse. It is so hard to find two parent Black households that have stayed married. I don't care if their are kids from a past relationship. I don't care of one of them remarried after death of a previous spouse. If possible, if the love is there, if its not toxic or unhealthy, I hope they stay married.
Too many black families break apart because of divorce. The ex-wife makes it impossible for the dad to be in his kids' life. The ex-husband up and leaves without reason. New partners add drama. Child support adds drama. Its difficult. If they do get divorced I hope the following happenes: they don't tell their feelings or opions about their ex and their ex's new life, including people in it, to the children involed; the parents should support their offspring equitably. Who ever makes more should spend more. Who ever has more time should give the time; Don't use the offspring as bait, pawns, or ransome; all parties involed, new spouses and long term partners included, must have conversations about the offspring as to be on the same page about the offsprings' health, education, social life, the method used to parent them, ect; Don't limit a parent's involedment in their offsprings' life unless its unheathly or dangerous; work out a schedule for holidays but be flexible if things come up; everyone who loves the child/children should be able to be preseant at events for the child/children and there will not be any fighting. At the end of the day parents should be able to do that for their prodigies wellbeing.
Prison is another major factor in breaking up black families. Black men trying to support their families by any means necessary, in debt, or just have a bad encounter with the law end up in prison. Then when they get out are unable to get a job. This leads to a life of crime and usually more prison until a black person ends up in there for life.
Over crowded, underfunded, and terrible quality of education schools are another reason. Black people have either the highest or second highest Illiteracy rates. I don't know a skill on the planet you can master with out reading. Even painting you need to be able to read the name of the supplies you need. In sports you need to be able to read and understand your contract. I understand higher education is not going to be the path for I would say half of the black community its exspensive, highly competitive, and racist. Trade jobs, millitary, sevice core, government jobs, the travel industry, construction, ect are all viable alternative options that not many black people know about. How can we do better if we don't know better.
Out of the 14% of 308.7 million Americans (in 2010) identify as black or mixed with black, I'm going to foucus on Black people with at least a bachelor's degree with a fulltime job. Out of the 43.218 million Black Americans only 18.7% have at least a bachelor's degree (in 2011). That's a little more than 8 million. That's a 5th of the black population ( technically its bewteen a 5th and a 6th of the population but its much closer to 5th). I wish I could tell you out of those 8 million have jobs and are living above the poverty line but I can't. I do have general info on poverty in 2010. 25.7% of Black and mixed black people lived below the poverty line. 7.4% of all American who had finished at least one year of college lived below the poverty line. 4.3% of all Americans who worked full time lived below the poverty line. According to 2010 data about 44 thousand black americans and mixed black Americans with at least a bacholars degree where employed fulltime. Just because they are employed full time doesn't mean that they are living above the poverty line. That's less than 1% off the of the 8 millions with at least a bacholar's degree. 44 thousand is 1/2% of the 8 million. That's 1/10% of the black american and mixed black american population and 1/64% of the total American population in 2010.
Okay so 44 thousands people in 2010. Lets pretend that its and equal amount of males and females and that they are all straight. If we were begining realistic there is lots of data showing there are way more black women with degrees and fulltime jobs than black men. I can't find trusted sources on how many of the 44 thousand are queer, through in 2012 3.5% openly identified as Queer, but I digress. If you're in the city or suburb around a major city your odds are probably better a finding another black person that is more or less your equal if that's what you're looking for. If you are a black person with at least a bachelor's degree in full-time job and you're looking for another black person we could least bachelor's degree and a full-time job the odds are definitely against you meeting someone randomly. Many black professionals turn to professional conference fouced on black people, like National Society of black Engineers annual conference. Another option is the historically black fraternities and sororities. If a black person joined one in college, and then joined thier local chapter after they moved, they have a better chance of meeting someone. The Divine Nine local chapters do a number of events together. They also invite each other to their own events. Finally there are groups dedicated to hobbies or interests specifically for black people. The is the black ski summit, all black golfing groups, and many more. Many black professionals join groups that align with their intrest in order to meet people. But its still difficult.
I've noticed amoung my black female friends we have a different mindset about finding a spouse. I know many black women in their 20's who are engineers, lawyers, doctors, or have a different extremely profitable jobs. Often along with these jobs comes a high demand on our time. Many of my friends want to have families but feel like they would neglect their children because of their work. Instead they do not seek out other workaholics, or people with time demanding jobs. They look for teachers, accountants, people with nine to five that never or hardly ever work late. They look for guys who can work from home, or have a job with consistent hours that allow them to spend more time at home. They look for writers and artist. A lot of my black female friends who have the high paying jobs don't mind and would actually prefer a guy to stay at home with the family. They would love to have a husband that stayed at home with the kids until the youngest was 10. That way they wouldn't feel guilty about not being as much. They know that thier children have a loving, attentive, and nurturing parent at home. If I was to have kids someone would have to be there for them, more often than not that wouldn't be me.
So what does all this have to do with Southside with You. Well the movie is about black love. What made me appreciate this movie is specifically that. It is so rare and often very difficult to find black love. To have a movie about a love story about two successful black people is a big deal. Often young black people don't get to see black love in their house, their community, or in their town / city. Media is all we have and we don't get a lot of it. So yes movies about black power couples in love are important. Gives people hope
