yes that's a grey's anatomy reference its from way back like the 6th season or something like that ( been watching a lot of it lately). it will make sense later. anyway somehow i have wound up in trouble again, i guess i wouldn't call it trouble as much as it is a recurring predicament that can lead to trouble. what have i done you asked. nothing really. i am just going into my 8th week of school and i am already very emotionally attached to someone who doesn't know how much i care. now i know what you guys are thinking "J skittle you can't fall in love with every other person on planet you need to calm down." but i am not in love with them thats the thing i just have mad love for them. like they get me and make me feel safe i can tell them anything and its not weird if we just sit and don't say a word. we have that "comfortable silence" thing along the "tell you my deepest darkest secrets and never shut up" thing. like low key i want to lay all over them cuz they are so easy just to be with. like not many people can co exist with each other without running into problems but i could just exist with them. but they don't know how i feel. they don't know that they could tell me anything in the world and i would guard that secret with my life. they don't know that they could ask me anything in the world and i would answer truthfully ( which means a lot coming from me cuz there are certain things i just don't talk about so i lie but i would tell them) i trust them wholeheartedly without a single glimmer of doubt. but they don't know. its not like they don't even know i exist cuz that wouldn't work. i can't be attached to someone who i don't know anything about. ( so i have spent time with them and they know i exist). like i have all these feeling for them but the feeling are purely platonic that's why i'm calling it an emotional attachment. but i wish they knew how much they meant to me. like cristina is meredith's person and vice versa they are my person they just don't know. i think it is very important for everybody to have that support it makes life so much easier. if you have that person who knows how to calm you down who can talk stuff out with you and can stand you even when you're being a bitch then you have a person, ( i mean its more complicated than that but those are some key indicators) congrats you have a person. i would try not to mess that friendship up because they are the person you know you can turn to when everything is falling apart that's what they are they for and if you mess up then you don't have anyone. and everybody needs somebody. so don't date your person unless you intend to marry them and spend the rest of your life with them. because i don't care whether its a good break up or a bad one nothing is ever the same and you have gone and messed up on of the few important relationships in your life that you need to maintain. but is is very important that you do cause you may think you don't need a person in your life till you lose them and you see how much easier your life was with them. so you may not need them but you sure do want them. so hold them close, it is not easy getting another person if you let them go because people who truly get you without having to be told those are hard to find. once you find one its like marriage you will know that its right. the only thing left to do is tell them. so that is what i am going to do with my person because they mean the world to mean and they deserve to know. btw i think we will call him esty and yes it is a man but i am giving him a female sounding name because of an inside joke me and him share.
(throw back because i keep getting attached too early too soon and people get the wrong idea)
stay fierce yo
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