10/31/18

Skittles: Jokes Chad can't tell

So on the Late Show with Seth they do a segment called "Jokes Seth can't tell". This segment has become my guilty pleasure. I will be adding punchline options to some of the jokes. The title is to avoid copyright infringement.

Warning: not politically correct at all.

The CW network is currently developing a show about a African American super hero. 1:Instead of fighting crime he fight racist.
2: His arch nemesis is White Supremacists aka the GOP aka the KKK
3: It's actually a show that just follows around a black women in real life cuz we're always single-handedly saving the world and not getting any credit
4: He defeats the bad guys, gets blamed for committing the crime, beaten by the cops, charged with battery by the villians, and gets sent to jail with a longer sentence than the actual criminals.

A recent study shows Black Americans get less sleep.
That's because the rest of America doesn't have Black moms. Black moms wake you up because you didn't wash all the dishes only to find out you missed 1 cup in the living room, wasn't even in the kitchen. Or she used a plate after you were done and you got to get up to wash that too.

The Mall of America recently hired their first Black Santa.
1:If it's not on sale during black Friday you not getting it.
2: The good kids sit on his knee and ask for presents the bad kids get bent over his knee and get that butt whipped.
3: When a 5 year old asked for a tablet Santa said what you need a tablet for you 5 go outside and play.
4: When asking for presents Santa replied you got present money?

A community center in Bakersfield California recently held a special Prom for gay and lesbian students.
1:It was just like a regular prom but with more glitter.
2: The red carpet to get in looked like a catwalk during fashion week in Milan.
3: There was Vogue battle for Prom king and drag competition for Prom QUEEN!

A group in Georgia recently hosted a event called come meet a black person.
1:They rode the MARTA for the first time.
2:They were shocked they all made peach cobbler the same way.
3:It was their first and last trip to Atlanta.

The Detroit Metro area will hold a new event next month called Black restaurant week.
1:A Black restaurant is like a white restaurant except they use spices.
2: A Black restaurant is like a white restaurant except there is actually flavor in the food.
3: A Black restaurant is like a white restaurant except nothing is vegan, vegetarian, or gluten free.
4: A Black restaurant is like a white restaurant except the food is not cardboard and is actually good.

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