Saturday I went on my first first date that will not get a second date or turn into a romantic relationship. This is a first for me. However, since becoming more and more poly I guess I can expect this to happen a lot in the future. We had been talking for 2 and a half months before we got to go out on a first date and it went pretty well. I was nervous she was late but it was still good. Now I'm straight to the point and I like to say what's on my mind as soon as possible. So I wanted to tell her about the 2 very important relationships in my life, Lovely and Amoriartii. I only got to tell her about my very platonic relationship with Lovely before she interjected. She said she was more of the monogamous type and me having a relationship with Lovely, even though its platonic wouldn't work for her. I guess it's because Lovely is important to me and not going anywhere, or maybe it's because I need to go see them at least once every two months. What ever the reason she did not want to pursue a romantic relationship with me. On the one hand I am happy to know this up front. On the other I feel I have just shot myself in the foot when it comes to dating. I have these two beautiful relationship I don't want to give up but they are making it hard to date. I want love, kink, and more love. Why is that so hard to find? I'm also incredibly socially akward so talking to people is something I only do every once and a while. Maybe I'm ment to be alone with my cat and dogs. I mean alone as in having a second person to love that I can come home to and stuff.
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