My brain moves faster than my life. I'm ready for March 2017 but it's not even August 2016 yet. I've already thought through the brake ups, the make ups, and the heartbreak. I think I'm going to pose a serious question to Amoriartii in February that will either move us forward or end us. I'm going to ask them if they could ever life me the way I love them. If the answer is yes I'll wait. I'll wait because every love song reminds me of them and sets my soul on fire. I love them in one of those non verbal spiritual ways where my soul recognizes theirs as my equal and other half. To the moon and back. Till the rivers run dry. Till the mountains move. Pass the ending of worlds. However, if the answer is no I'm going to ask them to break my heart. That's the only way I can get over them. My heart needs to be broken so it can be made again anew. I'm going to need them to tell me they don't love me and never will and mean it, because I know when they lie. My heart will break so incredibly loud, it will probably shatter me. But I will need this. I will live some how and find another to love after a lot of healing. Years of healing. But like I said it's only August and I have quite a few things to deal with this month. Such as my month long hiatus. Where I will write but I won't post anything until September. I need to decided if I want to stay with Cyborg. He loves me so much but do I feel the same? I also need to do school things, which is always so much fun. Plenty to keep me busy until then. I'll see you all in September.
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