Daily Struggles

I changed my phone background to a different picture that still reminded me of Lovely. I can't bring myself to change their name through 😞

Dos & Non 2016

Today is day of silence and tonight is night of noise.  I talked all day and I do not feel bad about it becuase today is for privilege people to shut the hell up.  By being quiet you can not only hear the voices that they're the normally talking over but notice the large amount of people being silenced. I say this every year if you're privileged and queer shut the hell up. If your not queer shut up.  Remember privilege is institutional advantage but also situational advantages. You can have more privilege in some situations and less in others. So where as I would be a privileged queer person I was surrounded by straight people.  So I get to talk.  I would like to reflect on when I was in high school and it was a big deal.  I liked it because I thought I was making a difference but I didn't really grasp intentions Day of Silence.  I didn't know about the murders, suicides, and I didn't know about conversion therapy.  I didn't know all of the violent ways people are silenced. I literally just thought about how we are not given a voice and not represented. It it's still hard for me to fully wrap my mind around all the different ways people manage to hurt other people for being who they are. I don't think I will ever understand it until I experience it firsthand. I don't think it is one of those things you can read our hear about and then know it.  I believe it has to effect someone you care about or you personally to understand what it is like for you to be told you and your voice don't matter.  Then you have to imagine that you represent an entire minority, and those people and thier voice doesn't  matter.  The world doesn't care if they are dead or alive. Then imagine all those graves. I can't. I've seen many war cemeteries. I've seen graves by the thousand and I can't imagine being one of them. Or one of those graves being my friends, let alone imagine all of those people being some kind of queer. Dead for just being queer.  Cemeteries are so silent, it's too loud. That's what I think today and tonight are suppose to be.  I think that the silence supposed to make you think and the noise is to make others think. When I was in high school night of noise was a time for me to party with all of my friends and be who we are with other people like us. I respect that part.  There are not many opportunities for queer people to come together in public and build that camaraderie, or feel that sense of community. I just wonder what did the people passing by think of our noise? Was it deafening? Can they feel the pain that runs deeper that than the hate? Do they know what we've lost? Do they care?  Do we know?  Do we care?

Skit: Day of silence

Friday was Day of silence and I completely forgot. I talked all day. Not even sorry. My feelings on day of silence has changed over the years. Before I was all for it, be silent, protest, yea! Now its more before you silences yourself analyze your privilege as it relates to the space your in. On Friday I was in Lakeview/Boys town which is a upper middle class white neighborhood. It was not the place to be quite. I as a person who is normally gendered female, I am queer and poor it is my duty to speak up and talk about the diaspora happening in my community. I want to talk about the police brutality and the misappropriation of resource. On Friday I used my voice to tell my coworkers about the fact that they are building a walk in free clinic in this upper middle class neighborhood where 90% of the people have insurance. Who is using this clinic? Who is this benefitting? But in my neighborhood where only 25% of people have some kind of health insurance we don't even have a hospital. We could use a clinic in my neighborhood to help everyone, not just queers, get better access to health care. I also didn't get to go to Night of Noise because I am lucky enough to have a job, and I need to work for a living. So when thinking about Day of silence think about your privilege and privilege around you. So if you are taking up space and your voice/opinion doesn't really matter, Shut the Fuck Up! So that the people who are at a disadvantage can speak for themselves. They know what they need more than we do. So how do you know if you need to STFU! Are you upper class in a lower class space? Look at your class and how it relates to those around you and the space your in. If you're at an advantage Shut Up. If you're at the disadvantage speak up your important. If you're cis ( identify as the gender your assigned) in a space full of gender non conforming people Shut the Fuck Up! If you're under the gender queer umbrella speak up your story is important. If you're hetero Silence!!!  Queer people speak up and let people know when they do something that hurts you. Day of silence is about is being quite if you're privileged to not only make those around cognisant of those who are being silenced and can't speak but, it allows those who are normally drowned out by privileged a chance to speak, be herd, and talk for themselves about issues that effect them. The big take away Shut the Fuck Up! Haha :)

DOS y NON

Hola! Happy Day of Silence. I know some people feel like this day is pointless saying if we are quite we let them win. That's not true at all i know this sounds stupid but silence is the loudest scream. It is spine chilling and attention garbing. Think about it like this you talk everyday you answer you teachers question when your asked you answer when called yada yada yada. For one day you don't talk and trust me people notice because it is not what you normally do. People notice and they try to get you to talk but you have to try to be strong and show them all the people who aren't allowed talk who don't have a voice.  we are taking the silence and amplifying it. they will hear us. Or in this case they won't and they will miss the beautiful sound of our voice from 8 am to 5 pm

Buenas Noches bitches! lol (your not bitches) Night of Noise time to scream and party. So Night of Noise is about breaking the silence and screaming out loud ( that's why it fallows DOS). Representing all of those people who aren't being herd. we have been quite for so long (about 9 hrs or so if you make it all the way through) but now we really need to be herd and we are going to make them listen to us weather they like it or not. this is our protest. this is how we do it. along with a protest there and epic dance party because we can protest and dance at the same time. 

* side note i am par taking in this day and night idk if i will make or if i will get rained out tonight but i am sure i will have a dam good time... i hope. i will tell you guys how things turn out on the ides of may 

Stay FIERCE!!!!!!!