Last week I was at my breaking point with White American.
***Side note***
I will be calling Whiteb Americans white people from now on.I am only refering to Amercans. But not just causaian Americans. Amercains that are mixed or are 100% a person of color that benfit from white privilege by passing physically at white. Even if only part of the year because of tanning. Also I'll be using quotation marks around identity that are how society perceives an individual(s) and not necessarily how the person or people identify(s)
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My boss is this white lady that has it out for me. Not because I'm a terrible employee, which I am. If she was trying to fire me cuz I was a terrible employee she's had more that ample opportunity. She is trying to ruin me so I can't be hired anywhere else. Honestly she is really bad at it. So she just continues to annoy me. However, there are 2 white "men" on my board are the bane of my existence. Amoriartii is being an uncooperative toddler havingba tantrum because I ended our romantic relationship. Amoriartii has manipulated my other white male board member in to seeing me as an unfit leader, we will call this other member Bond. Together they have decided that there are a number of problems and the way that KU is run and has recuited people. That this is all my fault. They haven't presented any solutions though. Only problems. Other than showing up to actually present our workshop, they don't do any work. Also when they have a problem that they could solve themselves they dump the mess in my lap. They are like this is my problem that I created, and even though I know you J Skittles are busy and have nothing to do with this mess, it is your problem now and I exspect you to fix for me with out any help from me. I can not tell you how frustrating that is. Then I have my random encounters with white people shoving and pushing me without saying anything. White guys never stop man spreading when I sit next to them on the bus or train. So I man spread back and they get super offened.
So it was the first day of March we have only completed two months of 2018. One of those months was super short and only had 28 days. Nevertheless, by March first I have run out of patience for white people. I took to Facebook to tell everyone I was moving to Wankanda to live with only other people of color for the rest of my life. I made a separate post saying that I am not ending my friendships with my white friends. I'll just have to come visit them cuz no white people are allowed in Wankanda. Some of my POC grad student friends are working on a plague to kill all white people and I am 100% commited thier cause now. I was convinced that there are more shitty white people than decent ones. In America if every person counted in the last census that claimed to be white died that would be about 75% of America's population. Which is a wild amount of people. I think it would be more than that though. However, if we expanded this to a world view only about 12% of the world population would die. That's if we killed all the non people of color in the world. We would define a person as a person of color if at least 1/8 of thier genetic make up wasn't white. If we assume that 12% of the world isn't at least 1/8 POC and kill them, that's actually not that much. It seemed like a reasonable amount. Almost everywhere, but Asia excluding Russia, would need to redistribute the wealth, property, resources, and jobs. We would also need to figure out what to do with all the dead bodies. It all sounded nice.
I saw my best friend this weekend and he asked me why I had become so anti white. I tried to explain. However, Husband #7 is gifted in the art of debate. Even when he is wrong he can make you believe he's right. I hate it. Basically he pointed out that the more POC hate white people the harder it will be to get white people to work with us. The easier it will be for the Alt-Right get these would be allies to be our enemies. Then I told him it won't matter what they think/feel if we kill them all. He said we would be worse than the colonizers who colonized North and South America. I was like but if you add those people with all the terrible white leaders in history up to this point, plus every KKK member there ever was, plus the opposing white people during the civil rights movement I think we'll be even. He was not pleased. I am just so tierd of being thought of as not as good because I'm black. I'm upset that I have to work harder to generally make less. I'm upset with all the policies in place to keep poor people poor and that disproportionately effects POC. I am fed up with the prison pipeline complex that targets men of color. I'm upest that systems/policies/ progrsms that were set up to oppress POCs where abolished without creating programs/systems/policies/agencies to try to undo the damage and even the playing field. I am upset that POCs are less likely to graduate highschool and have the highest illiteracy rate. I'm livid that POC are extremely more likely to be killed by police. He asked me "how does hating white people solve any of this? Do not resond Plauge!" The truth is it doesn't. If white people make up about 75% of America, POCs need white people to help us.
It is difficult though because I bet 85% of that 75% don't have any idea what the top 5 issues facing POCs is. Racism and deportation don't count. They would probably get police violence but that's it. The problem is the duty to educate always falls to the marginalized. Google still exist for now. Also public libraries, where you can go and read a book.
Let's say the oppressed to decided to tell the oppressors all the bad things they are doing and why they are bad. First off for some reason the privilege group hates acknowledging they are privileged and they are at the benefiting end. So you get all the denial or they get angry. If they are angry then the process ends here. If they are in denile they will pull up every random case where a white person had it just as bad. This is were the POCs are like 5 example doesn't mean we are lying. It means five individuals got a taste of what its like to be POC. We have thousands of cases to your five. Now the white people are a little salty but maybe get the point. Then you get the not all white people argument, which is hilarious. Unlike the not all men argument, where it is true not all men have ever sexually harass or assaulted a women. All white people have benfited from being white in some way or another. This involves the white people being willing to really think back on thier life. If they do they can always find at least one instance. Now the white people feel bad and get stuck in thier guilt of being white. This is extremely unhelpful. All white people want to do is cry and wine. The POC must now make the white person feel better so that this white person will be a useful ally. Why do we have to do our own emotional labor and white peoples'? This is such a messed up power dynamic. Now that they feel better and they think they understand all problems faced by POCs they are ready to take over and lead the movement themselves. Then POCs explain about taking up space and drowning out the important voices. Now the white people are confused. White people are even more confused when POCs tell them its not about how they feel or thier plans. POCs tell the white people we want white people to trust POCs, do exactly what POCs ask you to do white people, be quite when POCs ask/tell you to white people, get POCs the resources we need white people, don't invade spaces that are onlu for POCs, and get other white people to pay POCs to educate them (or if they can't you educate other white people for free). I've never seen a white person take this well. POCs also have to be careful the entire time they are educating the white people as to not hurt thier feelings becuase the only thing that is as fragile as toxic masculinity is white fragility.
This is why the seasoned veteran jaded activist don't do that work anymore. People should be able to state the facts as clearly as possible and the audience accept it. I don't care that talking about black men being murdered by the cops makes my white co workers uncomfortable. First why does the subject make you uncomfortable? Second if I'm not having the conversation with you, mind your dam business. Third even though I wasn't talking to you, you decided to assert your opinion saying the victim was a thug. What makes him a thug? Even if he was a thug isn't he entitled to trail? How come we can apprehend school shooters, white men, without killing them even though they're heavily armed? Why is his life less valuable to you? I think it is because you're rasict. Why are you offened I think you're a racist? I based it on your response. I don't care that my white coworkers got upset. First, because I was right. Second, I get justifiably upset by racist mircoagression but I have to deal with it because HR doesn't care. I think its fair I I get to call them out on their racist BS if I have to deal with microagressions.
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