I didn't get to go to Amoriartii's birthday dinner. Not becuase I chose not to go, but becuase instead I had to spend my day in the ER and missed my flight. But I think it's best this way. I need to ask them why they felt the need to lie to me so obviously. Or lie to me at all. I need to know where thier head is at. I'm not over it. I don't know if I miss them or miss being a power couple. We could have run a small country together. We could have accomplished more than we could ever imagine. I am a builder and a driver. They have vision and influence. They could decide were they wanted to go and I could get us there then grow beyond their wildest dreams. I know how to make theoretical reality. I'm just to lazy and indecisive to have the fore sight to create my own projects. So part of me wonders do I miss them or what we could have been. It's not often I find someone who's ideas I believe in enough to create with them. They have to bring something I've never seen before to the table. I don't deal with dime a dozen type people. So I worry that I'm also ruined. I've raised my standards of what I exspect. Are they too high? I crave the unforgettable. I desire to stand behind, fiercely support, drive, and work with the trail blazers. The ones who are unstoppable but need help with the steps to blaze the new way. I need more one in a million people in my life. Jonesing for a fix. I'm addicted to bad ass revolutionaries.
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