I have a few resolutions this year that I think I actually might be able to keep. I want to listen to understand not to respond. I think If I listen to understand I will know my friends better and have a deeper connection with the people I talk to. Conversation might have pauses as I process but I think they will be better over all. I want to walk away from conversation feeling like I know more than when I went in plus a sense of resolution that comes from deeper meaning. I want to think deeper. I want to question everything. Most of the time we do things just because we always have. Maybe we once knew the meaning of something but have long forgotten. If we reevaluate why we do things we might find the reasoning archaic or outmoded. We need to constantly being revolutionizing our lives so we don't get complacent and comfortable. That leads to plateau. I think questioning more will give me the constant feeling off progress we are all looking for on top of opening my mind a little. Last thing is I am constantly getting asked by my family, gay and blood alike, why I'm not dating. The answer is very complex and I am not going to go into detail about. But I want to love this year like I've never been hurt. I am tired of being scared. I want to live like I'm not jaded and do not know of the evils in this world. I want to love like I've never loved before. I when I fall, I fall hard, you all know that. But I don't live my feelings, so as far as anyone who interacts with me in real life they are left in the dark. I love hard but I do my best to hide that fact. This year I want to love out loud, and let the emotions I've have be known. So I am not going to shy away, and I am going to face the butterflies.
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