11/18/12

Skit: sinusoidal, an adjective.

let be be the first to say this My name is J skittles and i am a Pyro. and i don't mean this in the mental diseases where i can't help but start fires. i'm not bad, or at least i don't think i am. i just have a crazy fatal attraction to fire. i love it. i like to be around it, i like to touch, play with it and watch it be fire and do what fire does. i lite candles just watch fire burn and its calming to me. fire is also a huge turn on. but we aren't talking about that. i love fire which is to be expected cuz i'm and Aries which is a fire sign. but fire doesn't love me back. in fact fire should represent everything bad about my life. it has take away friends from me and ruined families. but i love it just as much as much as the water loves me. but let me tell you i hate water. i have to swim in it i work with it. its wet and icky. but its seems to be a constant in my life.drawing its self to me. however i do find the water calming in a darker since. through the water has done nothing but give life to me. i have saved so many children not one has ever been lost to the water. i would call these two the extremes of my life fire and water and every aspect of  it fits into one of the the two categories. most of the time i get a good mix of fire and water and i turn out pretty even. but as of late things haven't been so even. I've been hot and cold then hot again, never even. in fact my behavior has been quite sinusoidal. and its driving me up a wall. i wish i could stop and just be even but its not that simple. i'm not acting this way just because i can and it seemed like something fun to to do i m reacting to people (person) around me. and i swear its like everyday i'm being thrown thrown trough a new loop. i go from this incredible high to a low or vise verse. it has gotten so bad where i honestly just want to burn it all down and start over. i have a nasty burn on my arm that i got from doing some kind of house work for my guy friend. i keep rubbing it thinking what it would be like to burn it all. if i could burn the ugly pieces of my life away, bandage it up for a week and have an new ugly free life. how great i would be to let the water wash over it and clean out all the dirty gritty parts i don't want. 

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