Skittles: things my dog can do that I can't.

My heart has the self-control of a man.
Most likely a white cisgender man.
No matter what kind of man my heart is,
he probably suffers from toxic masculinity.
My heart is a man who's the reason behind the dress code for female students in elementary school.
My heart is that young boy who can't learn because he can see a girl's collarbone.
Oooooooo,
and that collarbone gives him all kinds of thoughts.
None of which probably invole consent.
More than a few are power trip fantasies.
Where my male heart,
has to make his female classmate feel powerless.
All so he can feel powerful.
My heart is the male teacher,
who purposely gives some of his female pupils lower grades,
hoping to get them alone.
If only they didn't dress that way.
If only they didn't give him the wrong idea with their misleading actions.
My heart is the scientist is distracted in the lab.
Despite the fact that is female counterpart is in a hazmat suit.
My heart is that blind guy who can't keep his hands off of his nurse.
She just smells so sweet.
Her voice is like an angle.
She's a magnetic force that his hands naturally drawn to.
My heart is Eminem in "Love The Way You Lie".
My heart lit the match and I watched the house burn down,
With the person who dared to tell me no inside.

My heart is so naturally impatient and untamed. I cannot blame it for being made the way it was, I can blame myself for not changing it. I named this post rightfully so because all of my dogs have had incredible self-control. Not begging, never entering the kitchen, never entering my room without permission, not jumping on people, never complaining, being quiet when told, walking next to me without a leash, not running off even when baited distracted or called, unbribable, forgiving, patient, understanding, and unconditionally loving. I've been raised around pitbulls my entire life. My parents brought me home after two weeks in NICU, they also brought home a puppy barely weaned. Bandit and I grew up together he was murder when I was 5. I loved Max for the next 5 years until he was stolen. Someone tranquilized him and stolen right out of our yard. We found the tranquilizer darts that missed him. I love Dimond for the five years after that. She was by far the sweetest until the day she died of the flu. There was a five-year gap after that. Sijambo was the first dog I had at my mother's house. He was stubborn and so entitled. Wanted everything his way. But still extremely well behaved. My brother tormented him though. Rightfully so he growled at my brother and my mother made me give Sijambo up after 2 years. All my dogs could do what my heart doesn't. Be still. Be content. Show restraint.