3/28/14

525600

This year ( starting June 2013 through June 2014) has been filled with moments that I vow never to speak of again. But inevitably end up hinting to or bringing up again and again for the rest or my 20 year old life. The story always starts the same with an "oh really" or a "remember that one time" promptly followed but a " shut up we aren't talking about it". These are the moments we can't quite remember and thanks to our friends will never forget. It could be a night of drunken debauchery or a weekend of weakness. Or even months of I don't give a fuck. You don't know why you did it or what you where doing there. It could have started out normally or with good intentions. I mean what harm could a little fun be its innocent? ( said the first person who ran with scissors) but now there are pictures and status to delete. People are giving you weird looks. You have to explain all those text you sent or calls you made. Never again you say, never ever again you swear up and down. As your friends we believe you; I mean you don't have to try and convince us. And we promise not to judge you too harshly when you do it again. Because you only live once, unless you believe in reincarnation or you're secretly a cat. So live life to the fullest while simultaneously cheating death. Do something crazy but remember in life there are no redo's so do it right the first time. Make stupid choices but don't regret the consequences. Life is just moments right? And people who never do anything worth talking about are too safe. So try to live life worth living seems to be more easily said than done. How do you know your living right? I don't know I'm only 20. But right now my friends and I have decided if you have about a years' worth of time that you simply can not talk about then you did something right. But that's just us. We aren't the best role models, we are all rule breakers. Just yesterday I was riding my bike on the sidewalk when there was clearly a do not bike ride on the sidewalk sign posted. Down with the heterosexual conservative rich white male! But its these unspeakable moments that color and spice our otherwise ordinary lives. I do normal conversation worthy things but live my life for these " a moment like this" experiences.

In other news I didn't go see amorarti over break. As much as I want to fly half way across the country to take them on a date I am in trouble with my family and have some other stuff going on so that is going to have to wait. I currently have mixed feelings about them anyway. I know I'm not at a point where I should be with them. I'm not at a point where I should be with anyone. But my emotions keep kicking me in the face. They are like a terrible toddler having a tantrum in store going "I want it I want it I want it!!!!!!! I HAVE TO HAVE IT!!!!!!!" Then I don't know if I like them because of who they are or what they do. I know I want to date someone incredible; who never bores me who does interesting things they are passionate about and lives a fast paced life. They are all of those things, I just need sometime to sort out my life then I can work on sorting out my feelings.

Stay fierce

J-Skittles 

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