It doesn't hurt anymore. I don't know if the pain of losing Eta Carina is gone for good but it doesn't hurt today. I haven't cried about her in a few days too. I'm not angry or anything. I'm okay. I feel bad for healing. I feel bad for moving on. I still love her but not in a way that hurts me anymore. Every dream I had with her has faded to black but I love her anyway. As friends or as lovers I'll love her either way.
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