Skit: sweet nothings

I have decide that Amoriartii is my sweet nothing. Words that sound pretty but lack meaning and emotional depth. Its like sustaining yourself on the idea of chocolate but you never get to taste it or eat it, because in reality you don't have any chocolate. I want to touch, hold, and eat my chocolate. Giving your all and getting nothing in return just leaves you empty, with nothing but hope to cling on to. All the admiration in world means nothing when we both know the words are just full of hot air. I hope that if I keep telling myself this that I will be able to give you up, but its not easy. It should be, cause I'm not even the only one. I've know about the sex and that doesn't bother me. Its the emotional attachment. I can see it when you look at them. I know how you feel, you can't lie to me.  I've had my doubts for a while but I guess I would rather be confused than hurt. Refusing to know even though I can see the writing on the wall. I can remove myself from it so its easier to be your friend. I can talk about it in the abstract with out anything tangle to hold on to. I know it only hurts me but it helps me keep you here. I know all of my advice has been telling you to go after another's heart but I didn't need to meet them. I knew I would never be enough but now I know who is, and yes, that might me act crazy. But I've met him now so I Know I'm not the only one. I guess as the days grow shorter so does my patience for this whole thing. I keep telling myself I am to smart for this. Too good to be putting myself through hell like this. I am way too invested in nothing. The weather changes, grows colder, and so do I. Everyone's time is important so why waste it pretending to care. I'd rather just call this a draw and move on, because we are way pass the hour for tears. But I am to broken to just pick up the piece and carry on like Amoriartii never happened to me. I need time I do not have to rebuild my life. Squeezing every second out of my day and most nights I hardly find the time to sleep. Don't get me wrong I don't regret this. I have lots of old friends and misplaced memories because of this. I knew from the beginning that Amoriartii was way out of my league. I could  never love them right. But this it what we have hopes and dreams for. Pray for rain during drought season in a desert right. Hope and well wishes might be all I have left to hang on to. Unrequited love leaves you feeling so empty. So please don't take more than you need from me. I don't have much left.  I was kinda hoping we would end up together but that ended in flames too. Amoriartii was my prayer for heaven. Left with the ashes to start anew.